Tag Archives: Money

But what if she ain’t having it?

28 Jun

By theVar
Blogger of StraightenMyTie

Sport,

I was chatting with a male friend the other day about your article From the Broke Files.  He was really picking up what you were putting down…until!  You see, he stepped back and thought about how his girlfriend would be all about free day at the zoo, free day at the art museum, and all the other none-breaking-the-bank (you’re awesome by-the-way) cool and fun things you came up with until she realizes that they are all FREE.

So it got me to thinking.  She’s probably this high-maintenance, face about town, used to getting what she wants, it chick–so to speak. This girl kinda reminds me of Party Girl (the “it” girl we love).  Come to think of it, Sport, she’s not much different than yourself. You both love free shit. Just in different ways.

Now the questions I have are how should/could he deal with her? Readers, what do you think would be a feasible solution for this friend of mine? You know what would be even better.  I want to hear from Party Girl. Would the things Sport mentioned in her post make you cringe or would you welcome them with open arms?

Our Most Gracious Thank You

18 Jun

Wow! Sara and I are chillaxing at our graphic designer friend’s house in total nostalgia.  I can’t believe it’s been a month already. How about you, Sara?

Sara: Right, and a helluva month at that! Thanks to our readers we’ve begun talking about things that really matter. We’ve begun to build a community. And thanks to our contributors, we’ve found that we’re not alone  in our struggle to navigate our 30s.

LeVar: Sara, do you remember that first post? GC33, what a brave soul you were. I <3 your face. Then we got the woman’s perspective on expectations from Kelly. I just wanna keep her in my pocket to give her x’s and o’s all day long.

Sara: It sure was nice to know that we weren’t alone in our questions.

And do you remember Alison’s moment where at her sister’s high school graduation, she realized that she was old enough to be her mother? Or when the Professor shared what it was like to be leaving his 30s? Or what it’s like for Lorrie as a mom in her 30s.

Or me, entering my 30s. All in the last month. Whew.

LeVar: Yes, yes, yes, and yes. I’m still in awe over Ryan and his commitment to not drinking. Oh, and we will definitely never forget about Party Girl. Can I just live in her shoes for a week I’m sure my legs would look great in her 5 inch heels and a mini dress.

ED, you can unleash that 16 year old anytime you want. *wink*  Adam…”I can still party like I’m 21, but for the two day hangover.” Let’s just say Sara’s 30th last weekend has got to be a testament to that.

Sara: So true! So very true. Thanks for the warning Adam, sorry I didn’t heed it.

LeVar: I don’t know. In all this rambling what we’re trying to say is that we are deeply grateful and overjoyed by all of you and the unconditional support from great friends, talented contributors and this fearless community.

Sara: So thank you, readers. Thank you contributors. Thank you Var for crafting and curating this blog with me.  We had over 3000 unique viewers this past month. Let’s see what we can do from here on out.

Broke, busted or just fine- Finances in your 30s

17 Jun

Over here at TTTM, we’re all about breaking down the walls and tackling taboo subjects head on.

We’re not necessarily wanting to know about your particular financial situation, but rather the things you’ve learned about money and finance in your 30s.

I caught this article today and was wondering how much of this stuff holds true for everyone. Having just entered my 30s, I can see that I’ve got a long way to go on some of the suggestions, but other just seem like common sense.

The 30s seem like a defining decade in personal finance as it looks toward the future in a serious way while balancing current lifestyle choices in an uncertain economy.

What have you learned? Have you struck a balance?

The 30 Year Assessment

15 Jun

By theVar
Blogger of StraightenMyTie

“Am I following my dreams or am I just stuck,” you ask? Mayhaps…to both!?! Just like many of you, my predictions of what 30 and beyond would be was much different than it actually is. I saw myself as a successful editor in a publishing house, or better yet, an English professor pioneering accessible pedagogical methodologies. I know. Ambitious, huh? Oh, the joy of youth and dreaming. What a bastardization of reality!

The fact of the matter is I negotiated the two and found a resting place right in the middle. I’m a copy writer. Not of the New York ad agency, award winning variety; just of the Denver, paying my bills, enjoying my life variety. And as much as I’d like to say I’m not close to where I wanted to be, I really am.  You see at the foundation of those “the sky is the limit” ideas I had of my life during my earlier years was simply being a writer. Trust me. I’m constantly arguing (with myself) that there’s nothing worse than getting what you wanted. Sometimes I think I’m right.

So yes, I am following my dreams. Yes, I am stuck. But, unless you’re some ass-kissing, privileged, over-achieving schmuck (or various combination of the said) you’re in the same boat I’m in—forever reconciling the need to be somebody you thought you’d be with the fact that you are precisely who you want to be. I can hear those of you saying, “I don’t want be here.” If that’s the case, change bitches. Otherwise, my word is bond. Now sit down.

Wait. Before you get comfortable, I’d like to know about your 30 year assessment. Maybe you’re exactly where you knew you’d be. Maybe you’ve taking a few side streets and aren’t quite there. The question is how are you embracing the choices you’ve made?

Images courtesy of Jesse Brettin, SPK Media.

Thirty and Fabulous?

28 May

Being a “party girl”…in my 30’s…the idea instantly makes me light up…OH! the overall “fun-ness” of having all the knowledge of my 20’s mixed in with an appetite for a social life that cannot be quenched and a face that most do not believe belongs to someone over 30. I love parties, I live for my social life – I cling to it, I crave it. I’m still a little stuck in a limbo of loving my 20’s and trying to transition into a more mature 30-something year old that many of my friends have talked to me about; however, I’ve learned to balance having insane fun and being a responsible, mature adult–not that most people would know that since all I show is the other side.

So as I’m writing this the image of a Sex and the City episode is flashing in my head. The one where Carrie does a “30 and Fabulous!” article/photo shoot and it ends up being a “30 and Fabulous?” (note the question mark) article, with the image of her rough from a night of partying and smoking and just looking extremely OLD… um…is that ME??

I haven’t stopped the GO, GO, GO since I got divorced in my mid 20’s from an over controlling man who didn’t let me have friends or a life of my own…I’m actually afraid that if I do stop and slow down, age will somehow catch up with me, manifest itself and somehow crawl out from under my bed and attack me, move me to suburbia and I will become my greatest fear…OLD and BORING.

Thirty. I still haven’t accepted it – even though I’m working up to 4 years into Team 30, I never hid the fact that I prayed to God to stop time, then tried to barter with the Devil to keep me in my 20’s. I cried on my 30th birthday like I was Ann Boleyn waiting for her execution and then put on the most scandalous outfit that I could possibly find to go toe to toe with Father Time and raged into my thirties with the conviction of a lunatic. All the while I was screaming in my head, “Please! I don’t want to grow up. Give me just a little longer!!!” Why am I one of those that has such a hard time with 30? Since I can remember I thought 30 was the dying age.  No man wants a girl in her THIRTIES for heaven’s sake. They leave their 30 year old girlfriend or wife and trade for a younger girl in her 20’s. How do I know this? My father was one of those men.

I have been a self proclaimed party girl since my divorce. I took my first single, unattached trips to Vegas in my 30’s. The first trip came 3 days fresh from a very bad break up. I now live for my “girls” trips to Las Vegas. How different that Vegas trip was when single, no one to answer to and I was able to do what I wanted when I wanted and with whom I wanted…the best part about it was that I didn’t even care what the hell their names were. I’ve been proposed to in Italian and French there by very rich and powerful men. And, I insulted them my laughing in their faces. Yes, they spent even more on me. I’ve been invited to fashion shows, given clothes that hadn’t even been put out for next season, VIP’d with the stars. (You get the picture!)  I admit it, I have been fortunate. I don’t have the Elite status of Paris Hilton or the look of an overly busty centerfold, but I do hold my own. It is a luxury that I earned in my super over crazy 20’s, working my way onto guest lists, VIP lists, getting my picture into columns and on websites until people knew my face and my name. My calculating 20 something days combined with an I don’t care I’ll do anything attitude have followed me into my 30-something years. I know how to be the “It” girl. I know how to spot that man that will buy me and my friends drinks and have him feel privileged he got to spend some money on me. When I am ON I am confident. I am invincible. I am wanted, coveted and untouchable. It is what I’m good at. I know THIS.

Thirty, as much as I tried to fight it, has brought me to a whole new level. I’m  “solid” with what I know, and I’m much more comfortable in my own skin (which I love to expose as much of as possible). I do look at the other end of the world of calming down…watching friend after friend announce they’re engaged, getting married, having kids, and as much as I’d like to be them, the thought of possibly being suffocated again freaks me out and sends me into a whirlwind panic attack. With a drink in my hand, music and a ton of people around I am free. In my freedom, I throw my head back and laugh with my whole being. Now, I know that being in your 30’s one should be thinking about settling down. Well, I’ll be happy to oblige with someone who understands that I need to let loose and have fun every once in a while. Someone who understands that I have a need to be looked at and wanted but will never actually allow anyone to touch. If that someone were to come along and choose to join his path with mine, that would be absofuckinlutely great – especially if that path has a party stop or two…with a touch of Vegas thrown in.

XOXO – PartyGirl34

Image courtesy of Ryan King.

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