Tag Archives: Friends

Brunch (via Hot Sofa)

11 Dec

We get to spend our brunch with Enya from Hot Sofa and some of our other favorite lovelies tomorrow. Don’t be jealous!

I’ve gotta say, I’d never thought about the maturation of my brunch habits until Hot Sofa laid them out for me. Check it out. I think she hit the nail on the head.

Brunch I have a hot brunch date coming up on Sunday. After much schedule discussion, taking into consideration adequate time to accommodate for some holiday party hangover recovery, this group of friends decided on a time. One-thirty in the afternoon. Bring on the waffles! I fully expect this “brunch” to last at least three hours. I’d be shocked if it didn’t. Something about tasty food, catching up, and planning future events does not bode well for a sh … Read More

via Hot Sofa

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Community:: #reverb10–Day 7

7 Dec

Prompt: Community. Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011?

Image courtesy of http://brown.edu

I really wanted to bring you some mind-jolting, esoteric concept of how I discovered community in 2010, but the reality is, well, I’m not that smart. Besides, my discovery of community in 2010 has been so much more personal and everyday. I mean, my discovery of community has happened in 3 distinct, but not mutually exclusive, worlds.

The first being Twitter. Who would have thought you could make such great and meaningful relationships through Twitter? Hell, if you let my buddy Geoff tell it, Twitter is the spot between the twat and the shitter. Geoff, I’m here to tell you different my friend. Twitter has been the spot between my right and left ventricles. Yep. Snuggled right up in the gooey part.

My second discovery of community was right here with all of you. You scoundrels continue to rock my world–sharing your stories; imparting your knowledge, advice, and support for each other; not to mention giving Sport and I a grand ol’ laugh. All. The. Time. This is one community I can say I’m effing proud to be a part of, and I’m glad to see it growing daily.

The last community that has really been a driving force for me this year is the community of friends that I have around me. I am miles 10 times over away from home, and my  friends never fail to give me that sense of family here in Denver. To all of you, I say thanks, and let’s hug it out. I love you all.

I hope all 3 of these communities grow stronger (I’m talking about spinach-eating-stronger) in 2011. I look forward to more fun times and amazeballs experiences in each of them.

Now I present the same question to you: Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011?

Guest Post: Making friends and going places

26 Oct

Our post today comes from my Lady Crush, Girlasaurus Rex. I met her a year or so ago and fell in love right away. She’s funny, smart and foul. All of my favorite qualities. Plus. she has a heart of gold. Did I mention that I really admire the way she makes shit happen for herself. Yeah, she’s pretty much a rock star. Enjoy…

When I was five, the second worst punishment you could leverage on the playground was, “oh yeah? Well you’re not invited to my birthday party anymore!” No matter how far away your actual birthday was. I believe kids innately understand the importance of social networking. The worst punishment? “You’re not my best friend anymore.” Ahh yes, even as a child I was a prolific emotional terrorist.

Awwww BFFs today. Years later the one on the left bangs the other kid's wife. Image courtesy of timeinc.net

But it was so easy to remedy those tragedies. You’d either make a new best friend before lunch or forget about the whole thing altogether by the time you got on the school bus that afternoon. As long as you weren’t the smelly kid (you know there was always one in every class), it was pretty easy to make friends from preschool through approximately 8th grade. I won’t touch high school in this post. No way.

A couple or three decades later, the protocol is worlds different. Friendship becomes something you earn based on a very ethereal recipe of mores. Sometimes friends are friends because they’ve known each other for years. They’ve been with each other through the worst and best parts of their lives and come out the other side together, often with some kind of freaky Vulcan mind-meld powers to show for it.

Some friends have what I like to call a “flash friendship” which is maybe not quite as sturdy a foundation as the previous, but is still loads of fun and enrichment. Flash friends meet in a whirlwind. Maybe they bond as coworkers. Maybe they meet as acquaintances of acquaintances and some common spark between them explodes into a feeling like they were Siamese twins in a former life. I have introduced so many flash friends over the years I’ve lost count, but I rarely make them myself. Always a bridesmaid, right? Sometimes these friendships endure the ages; sometimes they burn out in a dramatic cataclysm of horrific proportions. Real bad to deal with, real fun to watch.

Some friends used to be more than friends. Don’t act like you don’t know what I mean. Those friends are solid. It would be a mistake to discount that kind of friendship just because she got what you need, but she say he just a friend.  To have loved (or lusted) a person, hit hard times and split up, gone through any number of emotional and psychological hells to come to terms with the split and then decide the person is still so valuable to you that platonic love is an option? That’s gold.

And what else? How does one make friends in the absence of all the above situations? I find myself at a loss. The older I get the more difficult I find it is to actually make new friends. I can make the shit out of an acquaintance, but as I creep out of my youth, the number of people I feel comfortable calling up “just to talk” shrinks along with many other things in my rear view.

Damn that was some melodramatic bullshit. Let’s get own to brass tacks: I lived in the same place (give or take a hundred miles) from birth through the twilight of my twenties. I made a lot of friends. I grew out of a lot of friends. I filled every pocket of the above friendship categories and invented a few more, to boot. I’ve received so many suggestions on how to meet people, how to get myself out of solitude and into new social circles, but none so far as to how to take the acquaintance beyond coffee and chit chat without being creepy. I don’t know, is it creepy or too forward to tell a person flat out, “I like you and I think we should spend more time together. Let’s ditch this coffee house, pick up some beer and head back to my place for the greatest Wii bowling tourney you’ll ever lose.”  Because that’s really all I’m looking for: a new ass to kick at Wii.

So what happened, Scoundrels? Tell me how you all ended up BFFs with folks you didn’t meet on a school bus.

When paths diverge

28 Sep

There are times in life where you realize that you are on a different path than all of your friends.

There you are. Alone. And it’s your choices that have gotten you there.

I realized this about myself a few weeks ago. I’ll soon be the first of most of my friends to crap out a baby. Many of the friends in my circle don’t ever intend to have kiddos. But hey, this is no sob story, I stand by my decision to start a family.

The thing is, while it seems to happen at one moment when you’ve made a huge decision for yourself, you and your friends, and all the people around you are all actually on different paths. All the time. Continue reading

A Whole New Playground

8 Jul

There is a line in an Avett Brothers song that goes:  “I want to have friends that I can trust/ That love me for the man I’ve become, not the man that I was.”

It got me thinking. So much of our younger life is spent building things: career, relationships, financial security and friendships.

I’ve got friends that I’ve had since Kindergarten. I’ve got a few very close friends that I’ve know since high school. But then I’ve also got the newbies that haven’t known me for that long. Some of those I’d consider my besties.

As I’ve grown older, and become the person that I am, my friendscape has changed considerably. When I played roller derby, I found myself with more girl friends than I’d ever had in the past combined. Now that I’m not playing anymore, there’s been another shift where I find myself spending time with the kids from Twitter.

There is something to be said about sharing a history with the friends I’ve had forever. There’s also something to be said for the ones who take me for who I am now.

Am I alone in this? Does anyone else’s friendscape shift with their changing lifestyles? Friends are one of the greatest joys in life. How do you guys mix the old with the new?

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